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Looking for a Seven-Eleven
- By adam

I remember my first day in Japan. It was a truly beautiful day in Osaka and I decided to go for a walk and explore the local area. I walked through the park and saw the huge discount shopping centres. Then I had my first encounter with a Japanese vending machine. I had never seen a vending machine that sold warm drinks before so I decided to buy one, but which one? I put 110 yen into the machine. Then, holding one hand over my eyes I pushed a random button. Clunk! I retrieved my prize. I had bought a piping hot can of "Royal Milk Tea - British Style". How very Japanese! Anyway, I enjoyed the hot beverage on that cold winter day and from that moment on the aroma still reminds me of that fateful day in Osaka and the adventure I had there.

After drinking my tea, I found myself in need of a toilet. I searched the immediate area but saw no facilities around. Then, remembering my phrasebook Japanese, I had an idea. This was the perfect opportunity to use some Japanese. I approached the nearest Japanese man I saw and asked, "Sumimasen, toire wa doko desu ka?" The man shook his head furiously then indicated the problem. He was deaf! My first Japanese utterance fell upon deaf ears... literally!

Several minutes passed until I mustered up the courage to ask another man the way to the amenities. This time I got a reply, "kono michi masugu itte, niban me no shingou wo migi ni magatte, soshite hidari gawa ni kouen ga arimasu. Sono kouen no mukou ni ro-san ka nanka konbini ga arimasu." However, to my extremely limited Japanese, his response meant absolutely nothing. I asked him to repeat what he had said then paid close attention to his gestures.

"Dakara, kono michi MASUGU itte!"

"Oh, you want me to MASUGU?"

"Hai, MASUGU!"

"OK, I'll MASUGU up this road. Thank you. Masugu-ing now, bye bye!"

Every fifty metres or so I asked another person and followed the gestures. Hope was not lost. I went across another park and finally stood in front of a Seven-Eleven. There, I was confronted with another problem. The gestures stopped! I kept on asking people where the toilet was but every time I asked I received the same unintelligible response, "naka ni aru yo!". By this time, my legs were crossed and I was desperately trying not to laugh at my own pitiful situation. I walked and hid in shame behind the Seven-Eleven and relieved myself.

Feeling exhausted and thoroughly embarrassed, I decided to go into the Seven-Eleven and buy a sandwich or an onigiri. Suddenly, everything became clear. "Naka ni aru yo!" means "it's INSIDE!" I saw a big sign with the word "TOILET" clearly printed upon it in bold letters at the back of the Seven-Eleven. I was so close.

At the time, it was a traumatic experience that encouraged me to study up directions in Japanese. Now, it is my favourite comical story about how helpless I was when I first came to Japan, with no language skills. I guess everybody has to start somewhere though, right?

  Attribution > Adam